Tuesday 7 August 2007

Kevin's Covert Operation

Hello, this is Trevor Pigeon, from Kingdom of Trevor Studios. Today we bring you a special report from our Field Agent, Kevin. Kevin has infiltrated The Pigeon Lady's new place of work, and his report details the conditions of her working environment. This report contains scenes of a graphic nature, that some readers may find disturbing. We now cross over to Kevin, who is has reached the office. Kevin.




Thank You Trevor, and as you can see, I am here in the office, at the reasonable hour of 8.41am. I actually arrived at 8.30, but there was an issue of getting out of the bag, which contained a worryingly large can of Heinz Winter Broth.

As you can see, the temperature is a balmy 20 degrees centigrade, and the computer monitor is relatively tidy and free from clutter. This bodes well for quick movement, but provides little cover from nosy and/or light fingered colleagues of The Pigeon Lady.

Before long, there was activity. Seems that the tea can be made immediately with ready boiled water on tap. This saves time, and cuts out the need for a kettle. A definite plus for the tea addicts of this world. If the boiling water is dispensed ON TOP of the milk instead of the milk being added after, a delightful frothy effect occurs, in the manner of a 'cappa-tea-no'.

As you can see from this harrowing image, The Pigeon Lady has yet to stamp her mark upon the workplace, and is languishing in the realms of unimpressive, boring, and slightly vulgar mug design. The shape of the mug itself is satisfactory, but the gaudy colours and generic patterns renders the overall tea experience uninspiring and unsatisfying.

A hoarding nature and lack of challenging mental stimulus for The Pigeon Lady is apparent on the discovery of the beginnings of an impressive rubber band ball. Give this a few more weeks, and it will be hard to fit it in the drawer.


The office on the whole gives off a vibe that will not tolerate the comings and goings of a tiny clay pigeon such as myself. It is not so much frowned upon, more that they will not understand and I will be regarded with contempt, scorn, and perhaps even pity. But even in this hostile environment, there is hope of acceptance, as seen from this picture.

I am stood in what is known as a 'pigeon-hole' and it even is adorned with my name. I suspect that it is another office worker that is called Kevin, but the fact that i, Kevin the pigeon, am in the pigeon hole of Kevin, leads me to believe there may be some welcome to be found for pigeon-kind.

I did, however, hear a conversation involving some files, and how files are placed ''in your pigeon'' and if someone cannot find something, they are advised to ''look in your pigeon''. I am not sure if i like this custom of placing things within pigeons, because as far as i know, pigeons are not equipped with a pouch of any kind, so placing something within a pigeon would be a violent and painful procedure. Just to be on the safe side, I am going to stay out of sight until i can work out the true nature of this environment.



This has been Kevin Pigeon, reporting for Kingdom of Trevor. Good afternoon.

5 comments:

stinkypaw said...

I haven't been here for a while... wow... things did change! I had to go back to get introduced to Kevin...(sigh)

Anonymous said...

don't worry, Kev's very small, its easy to miss him!

Philip. said...

A fine report by Kevin.

I totally agree with the mug comment. Get rid of it for something better!!

Perhaps this will do -

http://www.cafepress.com/buy/pigeon/-/pv_design_prod/pg_1/p_storeid.55166141/pNo_55166141/id_12144535/opt_/fpt_/c_360/

Philip. said...

Or this -

http://www.cafepress.com/buy/pigeon/-/sort_byDesignScore/pv_design_prod/p_storeid.72829373/pNo_72829373/id_14297761/opt_/pg_/c_/fpt_

Purple Pigeon said...

oh my god!! that Pigeon Freak one may just be my next purchase!!